A Existence Should Never Existed

 

I scream out loud as no one would heard...

I cried out loud as no one can see,

I raised out my hand as I desperate for a hand that can pull me back,

I hid myself from the world as no one would noticed,

I drown myself in the darkness as no one care,

I run away from realistic as I should not be in this world at the first place,

I forbid myself from having hope as there are no dream for me,

I seal away my feeling as I am not allowed to have them,

I hate myself from the bottom of my heart as no one could ever love me...

My existence is meaningless,

Is a mistake that brought to this world,

Is a sin, 

Is a curse for people like me,

My existence is nothing but punishment,

For me to suffer from pain,

For me to not love nor hate,

Nor that i can beloved by others,

My existence is invisible,

No one can see me,

Nor they can feel me,

No one care,

My existence is nothing but a nuisance,

A curse,

A sin,

A punishment,

A devil come upon hell,

That only bring hatred by everyone,

A unforgivable soul,

An unwanted child, 

Even I long for love, forgiveness, warmness... 

I can never beloved by anyone neither that i can ever love someone.